Confession

Yesterday I was gathering some of Beasts baby baby items to send off to Pdub's sister. She is having her baby next week.  As I was doing this, I was getting more and more upset.
I AM NOT READY TO PART WITH MY BABY STUFF.
I promptly and properly told Pdubs. That this was all going to his sister "on loan".
Yes, he gave me a funny look. 
Ok he says. You can have it back. Then what.

No I am not mentally prepare to accept Beast as my last baby. The last time I would ever be pregnant. (Ya know cuz I make pregnancy look so glamorous and all)
I know this sounds stupid. I know we can NOT afford another baby now or even in the near future.  But to say I will NEVER have another baby.  It breaks my heart a little.
I have hoarded, and that is the correct word to use, hoarded MOST of Bugs things to pass to Beast.  For over 5 years I have had newborn clothing in a rubbermaid container smashed into a storage unit then a closet.  I paid to store those things.
I could ramble all day. I won't.
I am just NOT ready to accept that I have had my last baby. 

Ugh.

Ewww.

I haven't shaved since Wednesday night. Its now Monday afternoon. GROSS.
My legs are beyond prickly.

I will need to take care of this STAT.

Nope

I thought things were looking  up around here.
They are not.
Shouldn't get my hopes up.

In other awesome news! My sisters are amazing!!
One gets my an awesome mothers day gift, she must of known I needed hand lotion and new makeup!
The other sends me the MOST GREATEST AWESOMEST FUNNEST card I have ever seen.
  (i am now forcing people to refer to me as a MomSter.)
& the other sister is spoiling my kids rotten with fantastic dental care!!

 I am lucky. Can't focus on the bad.
One OK husband. (jk)
Two fantabulous kids!
Three amazing sisters.
Great grandparents sometimes great parents! (again jk)


  I just wish I could take care of my sisters like they do me.